Monday, September 26, 2016

How To Make Every Day a Great Day... Even This One.

Recently, I was stuck in a dreary place.
You know the feeling... Tossing and turning at night, getting up to turn down the air, then kicking the blankets off, drinking some water, finally getting comfortable, then having to pee, only to hear the dreaded alarm in the morning and press snooze until it's too late to take a shower and do your hair.
You'll just have to wear it back again.
Going to work, staring at the computer, wondering how you're going to survive another... 7 1/2 hours without a nap.
Finally leaving work, coming home to a sink full of dishes, a dog that needs to be walked, dinner that needs to be made, and a shower that needs to be taken. Feeling unattractive, not initiating sex, getting upset when your partner doesn't initiate it either. Feeling a constant longing for... something... you don't even know what.
When the weekend finally arrives, you're excited to try to finally be able to relax, but when Saturday comes, you feel restless and unsatisfied. Should you clean? Go outside? Exercise? Watch more TV? Catch up on work? Socialize?
You don't even feel like getting out of bed.
Your partner already left the house, meanwhile, you feel like a lazy bum for coming back to bed after breakfast. You're lonely, even when you're not alone and you can't shake the feeling of dread for the upcoming week.

We've all been here and we've left this feeling too, only to return back to it again and again.
But I've figured out how to climb out of it.

These things (sometimes slowly) work for me, and I want to share them with you too.

Cherry pick your favorites:
Put One Foot In Front of the Other.
Taken from Wikimedia.
  • Get Out of bed. Promise yourself that you can return to it again soon, then put one leg out and let the other one follow it.
  • Go Outside. If it's summertime, step outside, or go to a park. If it's winter (yes, this is much more difficult), go to the bookstore or coffee shop.
  • Compliment a Stranger. Don't be a creeper, and don't be inauthentic, but find something you like about someone around you (their eyes, shirt, purse, shoes, glasses... something) and tell them you like it.
  • Go A Step Further. Pay for someone's order, smile at people around you, buy a stranger a cookie (preferably right in front of them... on second thought, this might not be a good idea), but do something that showed that you went out of your way (if only a little) to bless them.
  • Find Something To Be Grateful For. Post what you're grateful for on Facebook, or write it on a note, or in your journal. Make it your phone background or say it out loud. Even if you're not feeling particularly grateful, I promise you that you have at least one thing to be grateful for. You're welcome to join my daily gratitude group on Facebook.
    Make that call.
    Thanks for the image Flickr.
  • Call Someone. You may not be a phone talker, and this may be super unusual for you, but pick one person that you appreciate, call them up (don't text, email, or message them) and tell them how much they mean to you. Ask them how they are, don't make them worried that you're depressed, and don't make the conversation about you, just tell them how much you appreciate them. If you don't have anyone to appreciate, tell your bus driver how much they make your

    day.
  • Hug a Homeless Person. I hope I don't lose you on this one. Admittedly, this one is a bit extreme, but it has never failed to turn my shitty day into something manageable. Homeless people are often not treated as human, and I don't like to hand out money to everyone I see, but I do like to just extend a small kind human interaction with them. It's really not as "unsanitary" as some might make it out to be. And if a homeless person is too extreme for you, hug someone else. Studies show that human contact will make you healthier (Eight hugs a day? Whoa, I need to increase my hug ratio).
  • Watch a Commencement Speech. This works for me almost every time. Watching commencement speeches get me pumped up about the potential that life has, not just for recent college graduates, but for people at any stage in life. I have made a playlist of my favorite ones here
  • Meditate. Meditation doesn't have to be the whole process. You don't have to join a mediation group (although you could, I recommend this one), find a guru, or go to a yoga session. You can mediate wherever you are for as long as you have. Just close your eyes, breathe, focus on your heartbeat, calm your thoughts, express your gratitude, sit in silence, watch something extremely funny... whatever makes you feel centered and fully present, because that's what meditation is for.
  • Talk About Your Feelings. I know, this probably makes you cringe, but don't let it scare you away. You don't necessarily have to voice them aloud, but maybe it's time for a journal or a therapist? The stigma of therapy is falling away, and it's a good thing too, as an increasing number of adults actually need one. If there is something wrong in your relationships, your friends, family, or significant other probably can't read your mind (that would be kind of scary if they could), so maybe it's time to talk about it.
    It's time to say yes.
    Pic from Flickr.
  • Start Saying Yes. There will be times when you do not feel like going out to get a drink with an old friend, or go to a networking event, or even attend your kid's seventh soccer game, and sometimes it is okay to say no, but other times, you will not regret pushing past that immediate impulsion and just saying yes. Don't forget how short life is. You are given a very limited amount of time to live, so why say no to experiences and opportunities that might just make your life even more worth living? Plus, maybe you'll get a good story out of it, and what is life if not accumulating a bunch of good stories to tell?

  • Create Your Own Happiness Ritual. What makes you happy? Do that, all of that. Take a bath, watch your favorite movie, re-read your favorite book, pick and choose some of the things on this list... whatever and make that part of your Happiness Ritual.

I hope that these tips can help you make you every day great!

Let me know what works for you and don't forget to subscribe to my blog to get more fun updates and tips!

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